That darn learning curve. That frustrating life lesson that comes from experience. We knew this would happen as we each learn to bend and give. WE knew it - we're adults who have adjusted many times to many things. The kids may not have expected anything beyond the vacations we've shared here when it's summer and temporary. And someone is playing cruise director. The cruise director left the ship, replaced by two referees who are clocking hours toward fictional psychology degrees.
Son P has been the baby of the family all his life and has embraced the stereotypes associated with it. His older brothers call him spoiled and golden and can tell you at any moment what privileges he's had ions earlier than them. Given his age and responsibility level, he's had lots of time to himself, choosing his schedule, maintaining minimal chores along with acceptable schoolwork. His accessibility to permissible media choices is numerous. His ability to share his world, time and media --- well, go back to the beginning of this paragraph.
The truth is everything we, and Son P, have been given is a gift provided by our loving Creator. He's blessed Hubby M with an ability to run a business or two, and the financial brains (perhaps stemming from his German heritage) to spend little and pay off quick. This house is full of things. They're not really ours, it just seems that way if you are a boy of middle school age.
It's painful to watch my son inflict pain on someone else. It's also painful to think I may be the catalyst. I've prayed for my sons to increase in their Christ-like behavior by being compassionate and generous. I've asked God to SHOW them their character weaknesses and TEACH them the right way. Any experienced praying mother knows that type of prayer is a wildcard. God can answer with a bolt of kindness inspired by a lesson read or a dose of a true life where a child is repeatedly pushed beyond his short, selfish limits, only recognizing his sin when he looks beyond himself to the eyes of the victim he created.
Cara and I are good referees and good communicators, easily admitting our own weaknesses, particularly now that they are glaring at us. Compassion and generosity are good lessons for grown ups, too.
